One ring to rule them all...

One pretty basic fact about me (that everybody who has talked to me for more than 10 straight minutes knows) is I'm a pretty big fan of the Dallas Cowboys. Have been since...ever. Last year for my birthday, I got this ring from my momma, immediately put it on, and never took it off except to sleep. Its kinda heavy so its uncomfortable then, so every night I put it on the hand of the little Cowboy figure/statue/toy on top of my tv (you know, the McFarlane jawns...its Tony Romo if you care). As you can imagine, I love this fuckin ring. Love it. It has a lot of fan-timental value to me. That's why it was so devastating when...

After a night of drinkin practice with my boy D (standart shout-out practice applies here...what up bruh!) I woke up in a hungover fog...now that's no problem for me, hell I got the remedy (and posted it...'Hangover Magic', if you ever need it...) so that was gonna be a nonfactor in a hour...the real issue came up when I stumbled out of bed, looked up at the #9 figure on my tv...only to NOT see my ring. I instantly felt the way a mom must feel when she look by her side in a airport/supermarket and don't see her small child. Unfortunately, I only had about 20 minutes before I had to leave...and I had to shower, dress, all that good shit. I decided that a shower might help me think more clearly, then I could come back and figure out where THEE fuck my ring was.

I ran back upstairs afterwards, ready to turn my room upsidefuckindown in my last 15 minutes before I had to roll. (Of course I had already harrassed my mom about it, askin if she had seen it...not at all...) The bedside table? No. Did it fall near my tv? Nope. Under the bed, under the dresser, under the couch? Na. (thx anyway g1 flashlight app.) Fuck! Panic mode...7 minutes left. Did I leave it at D's crib? I shot him a text to find out, even tho it was 7:30 in the morning and he was prolly sleep...fuck it tho, I wanted my ring, and I wanted it 20 minutes ago. (Sry cuz lol) Anyway, I continued to toss my room like I was servin a search warrant until 10 minutes after I had to leave... (yes, the ring was more important than bein on time for work) at that point, I said fuck it, put on my backup (Green Lantern ring...I like that one too, but I love my 'Boys ring...) and reluctantly left for work, pissed the fuck off and convinced Iraqi insurgents stole my ring or some shit.

All day my ring was on my mind, tho I knew it wasn't there and knew I wasn't gonna have it until after work...so I just tried to put it out of mind. What made it hard is every time I looked at my hand, it was a reminder of how neglectful I had been to my treasured item and how I had failed myself as a Cowboys fan by losin my ring. Yes, it's that serious. Around lunchtime, I got a response from D...no dice. It was a long day...when it was over, I ran all the way home from Center City. (Aight I took the train...but I woulda...) I got back to my house and immediately got to searchin my room again. After searching the same places again (ever notice you do that after you lose something? You know you looked there, but maybe if you look again, by some miracle it will appear there the second time?) Havin retraced every step from last night, I stood in the middle of my ransacked room, thinkin about what I would do without my ring, how much another one would cost, how long I was gonna be without it...that's when I happened to glance at my bed and saw...

My ring. My fucking ring was on the windowsill behind my bed. (Its always in the stupidest, most obvious place, ain't it?) In the first halfmoment I saw it, a quick wave of euphoria washed over me like I had just took a E pill. It felt just like the day I got it...almost like a 7-second sample of a whole nother birthday. Then, I remembered the last thing I did last night in my drunken stupor was take off my ring and place it on the nearest safe surface...my windowsill. Course, that's a fact that conveniently escaped me all day... I considered killin myself slowly for my utter stupidity, but then remembered if I was dead I couldn't watch football this season and decided against it. Still, to find it in such a under-ya-nose type place did make me feel like I should be ridin the short bus to work. In the end tho, the way I felt after I found it was damn near worth losin it in the 1st place...and in a way it was kinda like life in general...sometimes the stupidest, most why-and-how-the-fuck-is-this-shit-happeningish things are worth it to go through...just for the end result. That's good enough for me. I drank to that and went on with my day.