I've been asked the question many times: how can you care so passionately about something you have more or less nothing to do with? Well...besides buying astounding amounts of star-logo merchandise that puts money in owner Jerry Jones' big ole oily pockets, thereby financing my team (yes, MINE lol)...but that's both really, really indirect and kind of a stretch. Anyway, its not like I'm out there runnin around, why do I give so much of a fuck? On the surface, fanhood is fundamentally ridiculous...and I can understand why somebody would ask...it's a valid question. Well, I'm gonna try to pull you into my world and see if you can't go back to yours with somewhat of an answer to that question. I can only speak from the perspective of a Cowboys fan, but I'd imagine it would sound the same for most any real fan, just swappin out the team name. Here goes:
My lifelong heterosexual love affair with the Cowboys franchise started...around the time I could first pronounce the word 'cowboys'. I've been a Cowboys fan for as long as I can remember...I have missed less than 10 games in the time since then (roughly 18-20 years) I love the uniforms, the helmets, the logo...everything. It borders on unhealthy...I know this and don't give a flying coitus. Every girlfriend (and...everybody else period, really...) I've ever had and/or will have has had to deal with this as a condition of being with me. I'm gonna plan the birth of my child around football season (thx for understanding, apples...lol...) and hopefully, with some responsible parenting and lots of NFL films, raise a little Cowboys fan one day. Yes, you gahdamn right its that serious.
The players were my first heroes, and my inspiration to play football, something I did (and plan to do, but that's another post for another time) throughout my life. As a child I spent nights fantasizing about playing for them...and still do about twice a week. They've been in my house every Sunday (Monday/Saturday/Thursday...you know what I mean...) since forever, far as I'm concerned. You get attached after a while. I see the 'Boys way more than many members of my own family...and knowing some of the members of my family, that's a good thing.
Put simply, the team has been part of my life for a long time. I've been here for the best of times (yes, a long ass fuckin while ago, don't fuckin start) to the very worst (you REALLY dropped that snap, Tony? Dead seriously?), experienced all the highs and lows that come with caring when those things happen...and have willingly gotten on the rollercoaster every year. When we win, I'll watch Sportscenter again and again just to watch the glory. (Course, when we lose I avoid it like swine herpes. As a fan, there are few things less fun to watch than your team fuck up again and again...)
Being a Cowboys fan is the closest thing I have (or want to get) to organized religion. (Laugh if you want, but at least I know for a fact football exists...I've seen it.) If you know me, you've prolly heard me say that...and I mean it every time. To quote Rihanna, I'm addicted to the thrill. Its kinda like a drug. To me, there's no feeling quite like watching your favorite team pull off a win they weren't supposed to. Picture jumping up in the air about 2 feet. Now picture staying there for about 24-48 hours. There you have it. (For contrast, the opposite feels like being kicked in the stomach repeatedly by a mule wearin Timbs...emotionally speaking.)
Besides, to tell the truth, the best part of being a crazy fan person is other crazy fan people. The fan spirit and camraderie makes the experience of fanhood. For example, the 1st game of the new season came on yesterday and of course I wanted to (read: was gonna, no matter what) watch it. I went to the bar, and when I walked in, I knew nobody...however I did see a couple folk in 'Boys jerseys/shirts...fellow members of the Blue Star Brigade. I saw they were playing other games on TV, but not mine...so I went to the man who controls the TVs and and demanded my game be put on. After some snide (but joking) remarks about my team, the remote czar obliged me, sitting me in a dark corner on a couch with a big TV. Fine with me, fuck it...but then a crazy (but not unexpected) thing happened...one by one, all the Cowboys supporters came over, thanking me for saying something...and all the time the game was on, it was like we had known each other for years. We cheered, laughed, yelled, cussed, drank together like old friends...and that's how it should be.
You see, on gameday (or every day, if you live or work around other football fans like I do), everybody wearing your team colors is family and the other side is made up of the worst kind of people. I think its great when folk walk up to me in my 'Boys apparel and make remarks...because I love to talk football, and especially about my team of choice. Positive, negative...it don't matter, it all comes with the territory and its all in good fun...and truly, that's what being a fan is all about. It's just fun, it's a soap opera that lasts a lifetime, its good fuckin times, point blank period...and that's no matter who you root for. Its universal...united in our support, it brings folk closer together and gives them common ground to stomp on in support of their favorite team. Sports fanhood crosses racial, socioeconomic, and all other kinds of lines...because all a real fan sees is the color of your team. I think the world is a little better place because of it. Still...go Cowboys, and fuck the other 31... :)
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