Got Some Teeth

I can't date a girl with bad teeth. (When I say "bad teeth", I don't mean a slightly askew tooth or a small gap...hell, who doesn't have that...I'm talkin about a full-on yukmouth...) I just can't. Call me shallow, call me superficial, call me Ishmael, its just a line I can't cross. You would think its kinda silly to be bothered by something seemingly so minor, but to me it's a big deal.

I mean, for one, its fucka distracting. How am I supposed to listen to the words coming out of your mouth if all I can think about is whether I can flick a paper football through the space in your teeth? I don't wanna seem disrepectful, but I at least attempt to look in your face when you're talking, (key word: "try"...I am a 21-yr old hetero male...) and if all I'm looking at is your curled up snagglemouth the whole time I'm gonna find it very hard not to bust out laughing.

Not even to mention its definitely a safety issue too...let's say we had a great night out and we get back to wherever and she decides to show me some special attention. (Lucky me!) Crooked, jagged teeth can really act as a salad shooter. Nothin personal, but I prefer my sensitive areas unpeeled. Shit, I was circumsized once, I don't need that procedure to happen again. Its just never a good time to place your pipe in a pencil sharpener...let's be real, we all grown here.

On some real shit, its just bad business to mess around with a chick with seasonal teeth (you know...summer goin this way, summer goin that way, a couple are about to fall out, and you wonder winter next dental appointment is cuz they damn sure need to spring for one). Just sayin...you could definitely end up regretting it if you decide to go that route. Me my own personal self...I don't. It's served me well so far, and I think its gonna continue...maybe that's just me tho. All I know is, if you look like one of those carnival clowns who got their teeth shot out with a water cannon, I can't fux with ya...sry lol