New Years Revolutions

*fittedwearer's note: I could sit here and type some diplomatic bullshit about how I'm not talking about certain people or that I know that most of y'all are actually planning to do something with y'all lives next year...but ima just save time and say that if it hurts to read, you're reading about yourself. That about covers that...let's kick start this tho...

Aight, so I've been through 21 new years now, and if there's one thing I've learned over them, its that new years resolutions are 95% bullshit. I mean, people make all kinds of grandiose pledges and oaths to themselves that they're gonna lose 10 pounds or get a job or stop smoking crack or start paying they child support, and its all lies. Look, its all over Twitter MyFace (that does sound delightfully dirty, don't it? Relax tho, it's just all 3 friendsites smashed together...) everybody talking about "new year, new me" and "changes in their lives", "upgrading" or "transforming" and blah blah blah. Pardon my bluntness, but nigga please.

Let's be all the way real here...if you been the same funky mafucka for all the rest of the '00s, just what makes you think you're gonna be different in 2010? (And once again please, PLEASE don't hit me with that "new decade" poppycock...PSA: new decade: 1/1/11. Count with me...1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10. Ten years. Moving on tho...) Nope, at 12:01 you're gonna be the same dickhead you were at 12:00. No magical transformation happens when the ball drops...there's no such thing as the new year fairy. If your life sucked this year, its gonna suck next year too unless you do something about it, and I don't give a fuck what the date on the calendar is.

Even talking about most new years resolutions...really, they're just empty promises. (Its just like being in a political campaign...you tell little lies on top of blatant lies wrapped in egregious lies...the only difference is you're only lying to yourself.) No, you're not gonna be nicer next year. You're a bitch, you can't help it. No, you're not going to save money better next year...you just spent $90 to get into a new years party, and bought a new fit to go in. No, you're not going to exercise more...you're gonna park your ass right in front of the TV and watch "The Bad Girls Club" with a pint of Phish Food ice cream. No, you're not gonna stop letting your girlfriend push you around...you don't have any nuts this year, you won't get them next. If you're really not gonna do a damn thing, why even lie to yourself and other people? Next time somebody asks you what your new years resolution is, just walk away because you don't have one instead of just pointlessly sharing something you wish you had the cojoñes to do.

That's why as a whole, I really don't believe in resolutions. Resolutions last an average of a month (the week it takes to come up with it and the 3 weeks that most people follow through with it...they usually drop it before MLK day). I believe in revolutions. Revolution is a permanent change you make happen, and its not just because it's a new year, it's because its a new day. That's what you wanna do because that's the best thing for you, no matter what day it is. If you're gonna improve your life, who's stopping you from doing it August 17th or March 25th or...hell...December 30th? I don't know...maybe that's just me. All I'm saying is you control your life every day, and you can make any changes you want any day you want. That's the great thing about life...just think about that. Best of luck in 2010 and whatever it is you want out of it anyway tho!