Now you can sound cool on Facebook, too!

Skimming through Facebook the last couple of weeks, I began to notice that some folk that weren't necessarily the sharpest spoons in the kitchen (I know what I typed) began to sudenly become unusually witty and insightful with their status updates. At first, I was pleases to see that folk had stepped their social networking game up...I, like most people, enjoy seeing entertaining or interesting statuses...it's usually a peek into the mind of an entertaining and intersting person. (That definitely goes for a few of you guys...y'all be havin me crackin up on my news feed, and I admit that more than a couple umf posts were inspired by some status that piqued my interest...)

The old saying goes that if it's too good to be true, it usually is, and that's no different here. These dim bulbs hadn't sprouted intellect or a sense of humor at all, they just had an app for that!
Yes, a new Facebook app known as "Status Shuffle" will give you the appearance of being clever and engaging with just the click of a button...simply press 'shuffle' to get randomly generated, personal sounding quips like "weekend forecast: 100% chance of drinking on Friday with a chance of making it rain on Saturday", "is wondering why things mailed by ship are cargo and things mailed by car are shipments" and "is driving the crazy bus...who wants a ride?" (I imagine there's a huge office somewhere with thousands of little cubicles where they force an army of unpaid internet sweatshoppers to come up with funny statuses for the app. Chained to a laptop, overseers with arms folded standinng under a big ass sign that says "MORE PUNS MEANS LESS BEATING"...the whole 9...anyway...)

That's cheating! (As far as the game of Facebook goes, it's the same thing as steroids in baseball...it's not fair to those of us who do things the right way, who earn our *like*s and comments the old-fashioned way, with talent, hard thought, and intoxication...) How are there people whose minds are so bare of independent thought, whose senses of humor are that frail and underdeveloped, that they need a personality-enhancer to make giggles online? Are we really at the point in society where people can't even be quirky and original by themselves? Can they even appreciate the humor they post? What's the point of having a personality profile if you don't have any...personality? The damn status box says "what's on your mind"...YOURS. Just sayin.