*fittedwearer's note: Yes, I still tackle reality as well lol...I'm done writing fiction for now...
Aight, now I know that what I'm about to say will get me called all types of names. It's gonna be unpopular and/or somewhat controversial (It's something I think, what do you expect?) but hell, I just feel it needs to be said. Ready? Probably not, but here it is: by and large, highly attractive women (or at least those who have been convinced they're highly attractive by the internet...'nother post, 'nother time) make the worst relationship partners. The worst.
Wait, don't click that 'x'! Stay with me here, I'll explain. I know we're all biologically preprogrammed to find a mate that will enable our offspring to have as many positive physical traits as possible, (layman's terms: we love us some fine ass bitches) but the problem with that is it has no effect on the time you have to deal with her when her nipples are covered.
The first thing you have to understand about a pretty girl is that she's pretty. She knows this because everybody who could get her to stand still long enough has been telling her this ever since she became pretty. With everybody pumping her head up, can we really be surprised when she's not down to earth? Hell, I'm more shocked some chicks don't just float off like helium baloons.
She's been getting special treatment, special considerations, special attention, special everything for much longer than she has known your average-looking ass. Thus, she does not need you. She can have just about anybody she wants just by looking the way she does. (This is why I hate when girls who clearly have no trouble getting attention complain that nobody pays them any attention. "Why can I never find a man, wah wah wah..." Bitch look around! You're surrounded by them! I bet there are 3 within 10 feet of you right now.)
She does not have to put up with any bullshit you may have (and we all have a little with us) because you're replaceable. Her, not so much. If a relationship is a work of art, the pretty girl is the beautifully painted canvas and you're the frame. Guess which is getting thrown out as soon as a flaw in it is discovered? (Hint: it ain't Mona Lisa.)
Consider this...do really pretty girls have to actually be anything besides pretty? Not your everyday "oh, she's cute"...more akin to "daaaaaaayum!". If she has that, does she really have to be useful in any other way?
Does she have to have anything else to get plenty of interest? Nope...everyone floats behind her on a visible, wafting puff of pure sexy essence like a old-school cartoon character smelling a freshly baked pie in a windowsill. She doesn't need talent...she's photogenic! (See: Fox, Megan). In the minds of most people, including her, that makes dealing with her worth it...shit, you're lucky she'll even be seen with a normal like you.
Now, nobody is suggesting you go get yourself a bag lady. (Not the kind with a billion in her cart, the kind that should wear one on her head. Let's be realistic here...there's a lot to be said for personality and non-physical merits, but if your girl looks like something that could actually be some guy in a mascot suit, she'd better be interesting as fuck.) Nobody wants to roll over and cringe every day for weeks at a time.
However, my theory is that slightly less bombshellic females have a lot more to offer...it's because they actually had to develop a personality and skills to level the playing field. I'll take the fully-loaded 7 over the base-model 10 every day and twice on Sundays (now that football is over for me, I have way more spare time that day...*sigh*).
Am I saying that every fine female is a vapid, shallow meat puppet with lady parts? No (but I'll whisper it facetiously). Am I saying that everyone who isn't perfect in the mirror has a sterling personality? Nope...there are plenty of pug fugly, stuck-up wastes of oxygen roaming the streets. (They just THINK they're hot shit.) Am I saying that I actively seek out unattractive chicks because they make better partners? No...because while I could learn to overlook her unattractiveness in peacetime, the first serious argument will include very hurtful observations.
I'm just saying that all that glitters ain't gold...especially when it comes to trophies. (I mean shit...Purple was fine...lol...)
Aight, now I know that what I'm about to say will get me called all types of names. It's gonna be unpopular and/or somewhat controversial (It's something I think, what do you expect?) but hell, I just feel it needs to be said. Ready? Probably not, but here it is: by and large, highly attractive women (or at least those who have been convinced they're highly attractive by the internet...'nother post, 'nother time) make the worst relationship partners. The worst.
Wait, don't click that 'x'! Stay with me here, I'll explain. I know we're all biologically preprogrammed to find a mate that will enable our offspring to have as many positive physical traits as possible, (layman's terms: we love us some fine ass bitches) but the problem with that is it has no effect on the time you have to deal with her when her nipples are covered.
The first thing you have to understand about a pretty girl is that she's pretty. She knows this because everybody who could get her to stand still long enough has been telling her this ever since she became pretty. With everybody pumping her head up, can we really be surprised when she's not down to earth? Hell, I'm more shocked some chicks don't just float off like helium baloons.
She's been getting special treatment, special considerations, special attention, special everything for much longer than she has known your average-looking ass. Thus, she does not need you. She can have just about anybody she wants just by looking the way she does. (This is why I hate when girls who clearly have no trouble getting attention complain that nobody pays them any attention. "Why can I never find a man, wah wah wah..." Bitch look around! You're surrounded by them! I bet there are 3 within 10 feet of you right now.)
She does not have to put up with any bullshit you may have (and we all have a little with us) because you're replaceable. Her, not so much. If a relationship is a work of art, the pretty girl is the beautifully painted canvas and you're the frame. Guess which is getting thrown out as soon as a flaw in it is discovered? (Hint: it ain't Mona Lisa.)
Consider this...do really pretty girls have to actually be anything besides pretty? Not your everyday "oh, she's cute"...more akin to "daaaaaaayum!". If she has that, does she really have to be useful in any other way?
Does she have to have anything else to get plenty of interest? Nope...everyone floats behind her on a visible, wafting puff of pure sexy essence like a old-school cartoon character smelling a freshly baked pie in a windowsill. She doesn't need talent...she's photogenic! (See: Fox, Megan). In the minds of most people, including her, that makes dealing with her worth it...shit, you're lucky she'll even be seen with a normal like you.
Now, nobody is suggesting you go get yourself a bag lady. (Not the kind with a billion in her cart, the kind that should wear one on her head. Let's be realistic here...there's a lot to be said for personality and non-physical merits, but if your girl looks like something that could actually be some guy in a mascot suit, she'd better be interesting as fuck.) Nobody wants to roll over and cringe every day for weeks at a time.
However, my theory is that slightly less bombshellic females have a lot more to offer...it's because they actually had to develop a personality and skills to level the playing field. I'll take the fully-loaded 7 over the base-model 10 every day and twice on Sundays (now that football is over for me, I have way more spare time that day...*sigh*).
Am I saying that every fine female is a vapid, shallow meat puppet with lady parts? No (but I'll whisper it facetiously). Am I saying that everyone who isn't perfect in the mirror has a sterling personality? Nope...there are plenty of pug fugly, stuck-up wastes of oxygen roaming the streets. (They just THINK they're hot shit.) Am I saying that I actively seek out unattractive chicks because they make better partners? No...because while I could learn to overlook her unattractiveness in peacetime, the first serious argument will include very hurtful observations.
I'm just saying that all that glitters ain't gold...especially when it comes to trophies. (I mean shit...Purple was fine...lol...)
9 reasons this post doesnt suck:
Well, I look like the girl next door, so in accordance with your theory, I should be one hell of a catch. ;)
Except for that whole personality part. Damn. Gets me every time.
I've lived a few places, but I gotta say I've never seen anybody who looks like you next door to any of them lol...trust me, you have more than enough fine, funny, and other f-words to make you plenty a good catch...
And "personality" is highly subjective. Some people find me brash and abrasive, some find me funny and engaging, some don't find me because they would never look...what's important is that you have one to begin with.
You're right - personality is DEFINITELY subjective. I've been told I'm brash and abrasive before, too - I'm sure that shocks you.
Great post, AJ - you always make me laugh!
I was originally put-off by your language but I recognize your good foundations now ie. character, intellect, honesty, and excellent sense of humor. These days I find your personality to be well, charming, in a strange new age way.
Your are an acconmplished writer and the points you make in your article are valid. Blog on!
This is the age old problem men are faced with, beauty comes with a price tag. A lot of the hottest chicks I've ever met have turned out to be so "high maintenance" that they really end up being not worth the trouble. Not to mention every guy they have ever been with has been so eager to sleep with them, they have no idea how to do anything other than lay there and play dead.
Of course, the theory of them being less attractive and having a better personality applies, and in my later years in life, the outwardly hotter usually aren't quite as appealing if the inner attitude sucks.
But what I like best is the theory I like to refer to as the "ugly duckling syndrome." This is where a girl wasn't all that hot growing up, so to compete, or fit in, she adapted, gained an awesome personality, a keen sense of humility, the knowledge that it's what's on the inside that counts, and a compass to navigate her way around a bedroom. Then after high school, or maybe even after college, she freakishly blossoms into the hottest chick on the face of your block, and ends up well rounded. No it doesn't happen all the time, but when you meet that one, she's a keeper.
@ TT- from where you started out on me and my writings to hear that from you might be the best compliment I got so far this year...seriously means a lot. Thanks for letting me become an aquired taste haha...glad to have you around here :)
@ Justus- couldn't have said it better myself...fuckin' shine stealer...lol...
and the ugly duckling phenomenon is documented, but about as rare as finding a liquid gold well under your home...but here's hoping I one day find my golden shower lol
Awesome post! I like finally hearing that from a man's perspective! I completely agree with you and Steel! And...that girl probably isn't too hard to find if you open your eyes and truly look for her! :)
"Hell, I'm more shocked some chicks don't just float off like helium balloons." That made me laugh like you wouldn't believe! You know me and my imagination...an illustration just popped in the brain.
You're right though, I've often wondered this about certain type of girls. The dolled up ones and still they complain. Sheesh.
Ah I haven't visited your site in a looooong time. Sorry about that AJ! Hope you've been doing well! ^_^
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